Dead Leaves

Isaiah 64:6 But we are all like an unclean thing, And all our righteousness are like filthy rags: We all fade like the leaf, And our iniquities like the wind, Have taken us away

Shades of gray deflect the light into  shadowy darkness, as bare branches, click like bones, bereft of skin and substance

Driving the beat while leaves that have fallen from grace, black with decay, whirl and spin in a hideous dance

Brought to life by anger, hurt, betrayal,  the building blocks of hatred, are  the offspring of sin

Fueled by compromise, the winds of pride have carried us into the land of death, will it tear us limb from limb

Or will we glimpse the Truth in the  ebb of night

That we are the problem, we’ve lost sight

That not on our merit, will we ever see the light of day

But by the hand of our Savior, will true Saints be made

Sister of the Faith

A smile always lights your face as you extend your hand to greet

another soul who has wandered in to seek some shelter from the street

Your warm concern works to heal a heart loaded down with care

Your always there to share the load your laughter fills the air

You love the ones that others won’t you never ever quit

Never focused on yourself and you never will admit

When your down not feeling strong you brush that all away

For the chance to be Gods hands you help others on their way

Toward a loving savior that will set the captives free

The Lord  he is  alive in you that is plain to see

I am so glad I met you, your my sister of the faith

And I can see my saviors love reflected in your face

The Tongue That Must Be Tamed

Lord put a guard upon my mouth let it flow with grace

Help me say your truth with love help me not deface

All that you have planned for me Please help me obey

and walk the path you show to me before sin fills me with decay

For I have fallen back a bit and my tongue wagged when it should sit still

And soon worry, anxiety and sorrow is the bill that must be filled

Teach me that silence is sometimes the better path

and regret will not follow and I won`t endure someone`s wrath

In quiet tones you lead me please help me to get behind

I don;t have to be front and centre  for it`s your presence I hope they find

In order to accomplish this my tongue it must be tamed

Lord please help me accomplish this so in love I can speak your name

The Climb

Lord I whispered in the dark do you see me

The wind has shifted and I feel alone

Will I ever make it home

I was carried with the breeze and off the track I slipped

Before I knew it I was lost

Back and forth I was tossed

Sometimes I regained a foothold only to slide down again

Than suddenly you would grip my soul and the climb would resume once more

Hope was resurrected and my direction were reformed

Only to disappear again I was lost in life’s dense fog

Tangled in my unrelenting pride and blind idolatry

Clinging to the ragged cliff, Oh Lord where can you be

Than when it seemed that all was lost I heard a whisper in my ear

Let go of all those things you do not need

Your pride your envy and your greed

In the silence look for me and I will shore you up

Still your mind and  let striving cease

And you will hear me come and feast

On my mercy and endless love

Talk to me of all you do

Pour out your heart for me to soothe

And hand in hand we will make this climb

My love will be the tie that binds

My hand will steady all your steps as you leave your fear behind

Than joy will find you and my peace will reign

As I remold your life

And oh the mountains you will scale guided by my light

WALK BY FAITH NOT BY SIGHT

I have made no secret that we have been going through a lot of trials for the last few years and this week is no exception but the Lord has given me a few insights as to why his trials are so needed even if it causes us much pain. The first and foremost thing I have learned as of today is trials bring you closer to the Lord . When real trouble hits especially financial don’t be surprised to see all your friends even family desert you. Something about being poor and in need just seems to make people uncomfortable. A lot of them few you as being irresponsible thus they think you had it coming to you.. Some feel sad and that makes them uncomfortable. I have even had one friend say you sure have a lot of bad things happen to you and I just find it so depressing to be around you. After enduring many health crisis I have been told by well meaning people I should give up my home at the farm and just take it easy. What they fail to see is that even if I gave up the farm my health would not improve in fact I believe it would get worse. I have a disease that causes constant nerve pain. Having the farm gives me a good reason to stay active and thus keep moving so i don’t seize up. My problem with Kidney stones would not change if I sold the farm and my Chrone’s disease and asthma would still exist as well. What they fail to see is I enjoy my life on the farm and living in a small box in some town no matter how nice would not help improve my health.I am grieved that no one recognises the strength that the Lord gives me to keep traversing hardship nor do they see the hope and courage he gives me that keep my feet planted on the land he provided for us. I understand our situation may look bleak to some but I serve an awesome God that can  do the impossible You see if you are under heavy trail or crisis the best thing to do is to seek the Lord and not listen to well meaning friends and family. Often trials get worse when we try to work through them ourselves by working harder to solve them by our own strength. Some times in the words of Charles Stanley we have to come to the end of ourselves and we have to be persuaded by the holy spirit that we can’t live the christian life in our own strength we need Gods help and he will allow trials that simply exhaust your heart body and soul and when you are left in a sobbing heap (I have been there this week) he will reveal to you that you must walk by faith not by sight. You must surrender yourself mind-body and soul to him and ask his help in everything you do, Involve him in your plans hope and dreams and trust him. Wait for him to signal you on your next move. Sometimes the Lord uses a situation to persuade us to surrender to him our plans and trust him for the outcome. This has been a hard lesson for me to grasp. I heard quite clearly from the Lord that the trials we are going through were designed not to punish us (my husband and myself) but to bring us closer to him so he could advise and prepare us for what is coming next. I believe that the Lord hurts very deeply when he sees his child crying out in frustration and pain. Especially when he is trying to get our attention in order to help us not punish us. I have often joked that since i stopped working this summer and stayed home on the farm I find it a little lonely so I often talk to my animals and I was afraid my neighbour might hear and think I am nuts. But it never Occurred to me to talk to the Lord about what I thought were the mundane details of my life but the Lord made it clear this week that he is interested in every detail of our lives and he likes to hear from us. So as I go about my day I try to talk to him(in my head) about all the things I am doing thinking and feeling. By doing this I am inviting the Lord into my life and asking his opinion on things instead of asking friends. This is a hard thing for me to do and it takes practice but the Lord wants me to trust him with even the most mundane things in life. Now this doesn’t mean that sometimes friends can’t speak truth into our lives but we must be careful to make sure first that we are receiving Godly council than you should pray about the advice and ask the Lord to show you if you should act on it. I know from a worldly view of my life I should just give up and sell everything and move but I really don’t think that is what the Lord would have me do. So many times the Lord has rescued this farm when we went to buy it our mortgage broker came to us two days before we were to close the deal and said that she couldn’t find anyone to finance us. Jim and I hit our knees and she phoned back the night before we were to close that she had found someone to finance us. Than we had to get a loan to replace all the fencing on the property and we were told by the bank that I did not make enough money to qualify for the loan so they turned us down. Again we hit our knees and the next day we received a call from the same bank who refused us to say that there was a special promotion being held through telephone banking and I would qualify for the loan and we could pick up the money the next day. So many times the Lord has come through for us but somehow over the years we had forgotten that and we seeked the council of men and not the Lord. We had allowed ourselves to view our situations through worldly eyes doing things the world would expect and we got off track we were no longer walking in faith but by sight with worldly eyes I would be the first to admit it takes a lot of courage to walk by faith not by sight, to wait and seek the Lord but I know that if I want to continue to grow and be blessed in the Lord I need to trust him. So with this renewed way of thinking Ì will wait with eagerness to see how the Lord will work in our lives